What is Your Strength?

You could argue that there’s not much to be happy about. The stress of a job, the disappointments of unmet expectations, and the longing to live elsewhere are all thieves of happiness.

As Bryce and I are nearing our 2nd anniversary, I look back and recognize each of those thief’s all too well. They aggressively came to my attention once I got married.

Each season has its struggles, and each person faces their own trials. But the opening act of my marriage was set to the tune of loneliness and unhappiness. Twelve hours away from family and friends, a job that drained every aspect of my life, and slowly realizing that my new “home” in Alabama wouldn’t provide me much companionship other than dissatisfaction.

My friends and family during that season got a heavy dose of my tears and heard my endless self-pity.

I wasn’t happy. And people knew it. What I had relied on for so long quickly vanished. Schoolwork, friends, family, a packed calendar- and, of course, the excitement of getting married took up every square inch of my brain. But within a week, that all went away. It was Bryce, me, and a whole lot of Alabama.

At this point in marriage (approx. three weeks in), I hadn’t reasonably discovered the joys of wifehood. My servant’s heart needed a lot of tending, and my perspective needed a whole 180. I was selfish and self-absorbed. The beginning of my marriage wasn’t what I pictured- and it devastated me.

Nothing critical happened; no death, sickness, loss of job, etc. — just my immaturity paired with a lot of alone time.

I severely overestimated what happiness really is and drastically underestimated the reality of joy. The wise words, “happiness doesn’t equal joy,” weren’t new to me. I knew it, and I remember sharing those very words with friends of mine. But when it came time for me to enlist that truth into my life, I failed miserably. For years I had been living off of happiness. A good grade boosted my happiness, an exciting vacation with the family, a fun date with Bryce- and so on. I was coasting through life with happiness as my reassurance.

But when I didn’t have the grades to boost my morale anymore, and moments with my family were few are far between, my happiness tank was flashing, saying, “Empty!”

Being left empty on the side of Highway 72 (iykyk) made me realize I am weak and my happiness is insufficient. The things I so heavily relied on in one season no longer served me the same in the next. And that was a hard pill to swallow.

I didn’t understand why God wouldn’t want me to have fellowship with friends and family. I didn’t understand why Alabama seemed like such a good idea. But God did.

He needed to show me that joy is a sustainable replacement for happiness. And that joy can make me strong even on my weakest days.

Our circumstances determine happiness. It’s easy come, easy go. We could wake up one day filled with happiness, but by 4 o’clock, we’re at our wit’s end, depleted of all happy feelings. But joy is constant — steady.

How can that be? After all, joy and happiness are practically interchangeable words.

Joy comes from the only permanent living thing - Christ our Lord. Joy springs forth like a never-ending fountain. There is no death, no end, and no cut-off from the source of Joy.

However, the source of happiness is in material things—items, people, or places that pass away over time.

Happiness is a moment — joy is for eternity.

When there’s happiness, there’s a lack of sadness. Those two emotions are mutually exclusive. However, with joy, there can be a multitude of other emotions intertwined at the same time. Joy is not the absence of complicated, difficult, or disappointing things. It’s the heart and head’s knowledge that the Holy Spirit is doing mighty work inside us. Joy is a glimpse of heaven amid our dreary world.

“… Do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.” - Nehemiah 8:10

In the Bible, we are given the Lord’s Prayer, the nine fruits of the spirit, the armor of God, and so many other spiritual tools to help us navigate this fallen world. But when God spoke to Israel during their trials, guilt, and suffering, He reminded his people to use the Lord’s Joy to strengthen them. He could have instructed them to use knowledge, wisdom, peace, obedience, or a dozen other attributes to find strength. But His reassurance to His people is to have joy. Joy that the Lord is our strength.

It’s a beautiful reminder that despite how hard we try, it’s not us fighting these battles. It’s Christ in us. Even the simple Sunday school song instill these truths into young children.

Jesus Loves me this I know,

For the Bible tells me so.

Little ones to Him belong;

They are weak,

But He is strong.

We are nothing without Christ. Cruising on happiness and mistaking it for joy is temporary and bound to end.

God had to remove me from friends, family, a school I loved, and work that fulfilled me for Him to get alone time with me. And in that alone time, He showed me that I am weak, but He is strong. But like the loving and kind Father He is, He doesn’t withhold that strength from us. God tells us to have His joy. And that joy is deep understanding, and spiritual transformation is what will give us strength.

There might not be a lot in this world that makes us happy; but without fail, everyday can be filled with joy.

“It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.” - Galatians 2:20