Are You Making Your House a Home?

As women, we have an instinct to “nest” — to build a home. But sometimes, that instinct gets put on the back burner and doesn’t seem necessary. But let me tell you — it is.

When Bryce and I married, I quickly got to work making our apartment a home. We lived far away from family and friends, and nothing felt familiar. The only thing that gave me a sense of calm was my home. It was my personal space and a direct reflection of who I was.

I remember Bryce telling me that if he lived alone, there would be a tv, a desk with his computer, a bed, and some salvaged furniture from GoodWill. He was fine just existing in a house. But as a woman, I knew that my home was more than a house.

It’s where you nourish yourself, rest your body, recharge your spirit, laugh with friends, and, yes — even cry in your closet.

The house is more than a place to simply exist; it’s the nucleus of your life. The state of your house is a reflection of who you are. Personal style, aesthetics, and decor are all essential layers of the home. But I’m talking about how you treat your house. You turn a house into a home by nurturing it. As women, God has charged us with being the home managers. The tone of our voice, attitudes, and the conversations we have in the home are the first indicators of what kind of house it is. The house will be cold and uninviting if there is shouting, cursing, crude conversation, or a bitter attitude. A house is a place to crash in bed and binge tv, but a home is filled with life and love.

Beyond the emotional needs a home can carry, there are also physical needs. A clear indicator for me when my walk with the Lord is losing strength is when the practical needs of the home are pushed to the side. It’s when my home starts to form pockets of clutter, and preparing dinner isn’t a top priority. I’ll push off the laundry and convince myself to go out to eat.

I slip into compliance and then wonder why I feel overwhelmed.

I speed through my Bible reading and say a quick prayer to get me through the day. But that type of relationship with God is just telling Him that my laziness takes priority over my God-given job.

All that is visible through the state of my house

I manage the house and serve it well- but if I am not listening to Christ, I manage based on my standards and not God’s. A home is a mirror into the heart and mind. A bitter heart and a clouded mind make for an overrun house that lacks warmth. But a joyful and tidy home reflects a close-knit spirit to one’s Creator.

Of course, with plenty of notice, we can rush to clean the house and light a candle to add warmth. But the true indicator of a warm and loving home is based on those who live with you. How does your husband or roommate feel right before they step into the house? Are they dreading the cold feeling when they step inside, or are they rushing towards the door because they know they will find a place of rest?

For women, specifically wives, look around your house, and have God search your heart. Does it feel like a home? It’s not the square footage but the heartbeat felt when someone walks through your door that matters. If you unexpectedly had a guest at your front step, how do you greet them, and what would they find behind your door? Would they find a well-managed home where things run smoothly? Would they be able to sense your joy and fulfillment by serving them? Furthermore, would your home be welcoming enough that it’s a place where people want to come back?

And as for the husband, when he comes home, does a part of him feel whole again? The world is chaotic, messy, and unattractive. So our houses should be the opposite. It should be a place where rest is found, food is served, and love is given. If the home is filled with the love of Christ and needs are met, there will be a greater desire for your family to want to come back home.

My model is my mom’s house. She built a home that was our family’s safe place. There’s comfort, joy, safety, laughter, and much love. To this day, I look forward to the times I can visit my mom’s house. I know she manages the home well, and I can sense the presence of the Lord dwelling among my family.

That is the same desire I have for my home now that I’m married. I want Bryce to find rest in our home. I want friends to know they’ll always have a place with us, and I pray they can tell that they are stepping into a home — not just a house.

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As a biblical woman, our first mission field is the home. Your husband, kids, family, and friends will feel Christ’s love through you when you nurture your home. It’s a gift and a blessing. Treat your home as a living thing, and watch it grow over time.

Women, we have a powerful force when it comes to the home. We are the ones who can breathe life into something made out of wood and concrete. Serve your house well, and make it a home. Make it tidy, comforting, peaceful, and joyful.

If you find your house overrun or neglected, I encourage you to examine your quiet time with the Lord. Being fed by God will help you feed your home. God wants you to love your home because it’s your first mission field.